This is the first time in a very long time that I am writing a truly transparent post. The words contained below are straight from my heart and soul.
I recently purchased a book “What Women Fear” by Angie Smith. I have not even cracked open the book yet. The title alone has my mind reeling. There have been many times in my life that I have been crippled by my fears.
I have so many fears, everyday fears, long term fears. What would it feel like to replace those fears with faith and hope and dreams instead? I would love to know. I figure that one of the only ways to overcome some of my fears will be to list what I fear (and read the book to see what Angie says since she has overcome so many of her own fears).
- I fear that I will not live up to expectations. Not just others expectations, but my own. What if I really am not good enough for that job? What if I mess up dinner? What if I am really not a good enough mom? What if the outcome of my life is my failures instead of my accomplishments?
- I fear that I won’t be able to see all three of my kids grow up. I have witnessed so many young lives cut so very short. I pray everyday that I won’t be forced to witness it first hand with my own child.
- I fear I won’t be able to meet the needs of my family. We have lost so much, through poor choices, and tough economic times. What if after not being able to meet wants, we start not being able to meet needs as well?
- I fear that I will never get over mistakes that I have made.
- I fear I’m a disappoint to God. That I get in the way of His plan. That I don’t communicate the things that He wants me to. I just don’t measure up.
- I fear my kids will grow up and move away. That the only time I will be able to see them is vacations and holidays. I want them to become responsible adults and have a life of their own. I just want to continue to be a part of their life.
- I fear that I will not be able to overcome my fears.